Monday, December 20, 2010

I forgot the happy thoughts!

I must say that I am no Tinkerbell...
#1 I like slippers but not to wear all the time.
#2 That shade of green just isn't me.
#3 I cannot fly...I tried but I cannot fly and for all my endeavors I am black and blue all over and thanking my lucky stars I didn't break anything vital.

Yesterday morning, I awoke to the sounds of little boys plotting...all mothers have this 7th sense of trouble brewing...and I could feel it in my bones and by the muted whispers. Jumping out of bed I rushed downstairs, praying that the tree and presents remained untouched, and my foot hit the top step...and then a flew down the rest with an ungraceful get the point.

Obviously, I didn't make it to church.  I stayed on the couch bowing to the God's of Advil.

This once again confirms my feelings that the stairs are cursed...(someday I will share the babysitter and and screw in foot on stairs story).

The cherry on top is I had to go to work today! Yippee! Busiest two days of the entire year and I am feeling like a Mack Truck ran over my body. Thankful the day is nearly over and Josh took pity on me and is bathing and putting the kids to bed. Gotta love him:)

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Defying Common Sense? Bravery? Stupidity??

I should have been a Girl Scout because today I earned my shopping badge. Not only did I go with NO list, I also took all three kids, on the last Saturday before Christmas, ALONE, skipping lunch...oh ya! I declare myself officially SUPERMOM!

I will admit, my knees quivered as I sat in traffic, realizing that I could not see ANY free parking spaces, at any of the malls...traffic was crawling, stores were bursting at the seams...but I was determined because #1 I needed kitty getting around that one:( And love my kitty but he is a feline garberator and will eat anything and to put it politely he is we need to good stuff from Walmart! and #2...I (cough)..never got Josh a present (never claimed to be wife of the year).

So, with three kids, who are STARVING (cause it had been 2 hours since they had emptied the pantry) we ventured to the malls...

We managed to cruise through stores and I think the salesmen either felt sorry for me or realized I was too distracted by my kids and would buy anything...and they carried parcels to the car for me.

Walmart resembled a ZOO...Holy Hannah!! I gave the kids a short lecture on getting lost, going with strangers...ugh! In our home town I don't need to have worries like that because the lovely thing about small towns is everyone knows who's kid is who's and the obvious factor that we never have a crowd like that...but Saint John Walmart?? I think the population of the shoppers could have been a small town. For the first time I was nervous about the boys getting separated. My fears were justified as the crowd was insane, people pushing through aisles...
God love my boys, because they held onto the sides of the cart and bulldozed through people! I am excusing them, asking them to move because people are glaring as we took up the ENTIRE aisle...Charlie on one side, my with the cart and Kathleen in the middle and Peter on the other side. People were trying to sneak past them but nothing was making them move and fear of loosening their grip!

We saved Michaels Craft Store for the end...the holiday stuff is now 70% off and we had a great time looking around, pointing at things, the boys love those little foam houses and they were THRILLED that the HUGE big one they coveted from September was now 70% off and affordable, they got the last one...and even though the side of the package was busted (that is normally a deal breaker for Peter) they were on cloud NINE! I expect excellent behaviour tomorrow morning and till mid afternoon before we have a chance to make it...$7.00 of bribery =excellent day for Mom.

As we were checking out of there, some crazy older lady came over and tried to buckle the seat belt strap over Kathleen...I didn't buckle it because it was WAY to tight and small...the lady was making high pitch sounds and commented, 'Mommy needs to learn to keep you safe!' Before I could explain Kathleen gave one of her famous high pitch screams...I cannot promise that no glass vases did not shatter down back, it was a good one that made everyone in line wince. I just smiled and said, 'The seat belt is too tight and cannot be strapped, don't touch her, she doesn't like strangers touching her.' Ugh!

I lost count of the 'Mom of Many' comments..'You have your hands full', 'Wow, you are busy!', 'Three, huh? You are done now?', 'Are they all yours?'...

Come on folks! I only have three kids, just wait till I add 2 or 3 more...then I guess it would be comment worthy.

All in all we only upset two small displays, 3 tantrums, 1 bribe of M&M's from my purse, and one compromise that we will eat out...I survived victoriously (if you count someone screaming 35 minutes straight on the way home)!

Presents are all wrapped and under the tree, kids some are not what I would call 'neatly wrapped'.

I am praying the kids can keep the secret of what we bought Josh...

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Life Just Ain't Fair!

Seriously...I know my Josh loves me. I wow him with my super powers of growing cute babies, I amaze him with my macaroons, I astonish (and I had to use the thesaurus to find another word) him with the ability to laugh at any situation....except this one.

Does he really expect me understand this cruelty?
Does he really expect me to accept that he doesn't have time to hook it up?
Does he not understand I have been waiting nearly 12 years?

So, there it sits....staring at me...mocking me....

Excuse me, I have to go do dishes....and have a good cry....(*sniffle* he swears he loves me....yet there is a box...)

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Secrets of a Lazy Mom

This morning started as a normal  morning, alarm went off at 7:10 and I hunkered in bed till 7:30pm, cuddling Kathleen and listening to the radio, knowing I was making myself late, trying to justify the laziness with the fact that the school was closed and did not need to drive Peter there and that would save 10 mins...but wishing I didn't have to go to work (****disclaimer at the bottom)

After peeling myself from the bed and getting the kids fed, everyone dressed I put the dog out and VOILA!!!!

Five inches of the fluffy stuff...attempted to move the van and decided, after the van swerved sideways in our driveway, that I was STAYING HOME!!!!  I cancelled my day, called clients, and played Scarlett O'Hara regarding the worries of all those appointments I now needed to reschedule.

So the day typical fashion I did about 15 mins of housework...then sat at the computer...boys went outside to play and Kathleen decided my lap was the place to be entertained.

And in the means of housework go done...

Talked on the phone with my sister till my phones died.

And nothing got done....

Did some purchasing for my hair accessories biz...

And nothing got done...(do you see a trend?)

Boys went outside to play a second time and Kathleen and I decided to do something productive...we started by eating chocolate...

and then did some holiday baking. We made peanut butter and chocolate squares (bars for all you American folks), whipped up some batter for sugar and shortbread cookies (setting in the fridge and ready for rolling and cookie cutters).

Ended my evening with Kathleen showing me how to feed her babies...her screaming BABY at 80 dbls and showing her her cheesy smile...

And then it hits me....

Every evening a please a logical argument for me staying home full time with the kids and part of that argument involves me complaining about the state of the housework....and the house is a pit.

Now, when my darling hubby is home with the kids, and I am at work, I know that i will arrive to dishes 1/3 done and 4+ loads of laundry washed but piled unfolded on the couch but the rest of the house? Well, if a house could throw up...that is the look at he has been home for a day.

But me? Oh! I am much smarter then that! These are my top secret tips to cleaning quickly so it looks like you have worked hard all day! (yes, I am brazen enough to write this because my husband doesn't read this blog)

The trick is to do enough dishes that the counters are clean, but leave the sink full of those that need to soak.
Make sure counters and kitchen table are clean.
Floors and one couch clean (one is usually piled with stuff)
Grab a laundry basket and fill with homeless items (toys, hairbrushes, dog stuff that is Just laying around and needs to be put away but that takes TIME)
Straighten the tidy couch cushions.
Cook something yummy and snacky so he doesn't notice the rest of the mess...
Pick one area that is normally a big mess and take the time to clean that...(today that was the craft area which is always a wreck but now is TIDY)

Sorry dear but it never look at the house and compliment me for all my hard work...and yes the truth is I was lazy today and played with my kids:)

***I should put a disclaimer to my whines about going to work, it is not the job itself but the hectic life that needs to revolves around my career...I love my job, I love my work, sometime I will post more about this...right now I need to go rescue the bathroom from the boys who are playing in it:)

Building an Ark

Up here in New Brunswick, Canada we normally enjoy pretty white Christmases but at least frosty green ones...but yesterday we experienced something a bit weird...Florida weather!! Not the balmy sunny kind but rather the rainy, humid windy kind!! At first the kids were a bit excited but all the wind...the rain was coming done HARD...then then our dog started whimpering, for no reason. I missed his cue but soon he gave a nice wail or a warning and BOOM!! Thunder and lightning!! UNREAL! We normally have NEVER seen or heard of that in December and 10 days before Christmas.

Being a smart mommy, I took Kathleen with me to the grocery store because all I thought was if we lose power I cannot cook dinner...and if I can`t cook the kids are gonna be cranky...worst of all that means no cartoons and that could be ugly!

So, I made a super yummy super at 3pm (which immediatly prompted a tantrum from Charlie who becomes instantly starving at the smell or sight of food)...and the power never went off. I totally jinxed that scenario. (told you I was smart!)

After the kids were all asleep the reality sunk in...our county was flooding and flooding fast.  St Stephen has declared a state of disaster.

Yup it is really bad, that was taken in the evneing and this morning the flooding is 8 feet deep...and guess what folks? My grooming shop is on the same street as all this fun!

My grooming friends are all worried for me and sympathetic but guess what? I am betting, with 100% accuracy that my shop is FINE and dry. I am going into work tomorrow with this faith...and the part that scares me the most? This is my busiest time of the year, as in dog-gone nutty...and I had to cancel all my clients for today and rebook them before Christmas, so work is going to be over crowded, over booked and plain out miserable. Yippers...

Monday, December 13, 2010

The Truth was Revealed

Last week Charlie announced that he needed to see Santa, to 'have a talk with him'...I will admit my heart gave a little skip. What would come out of his mouth...seriously?! Charlie has a penchant for saying the ONE thing you asked him not to say!

I took him to the bathroom at Walmart, while Josh was at the checkout with the other two we were washing our hands I gave him the nice motherly speech about not having to talk about being in the bathroom, just to be quiet and talk with his brother and we approached the checkout, Charlie announced to the packed holiday shoppers, 'Daddy! I just had a BIG POOP!' Nice, glad my little talk sunk in...

So, off to Santa we go...two Saturdays before Christmas, the parking lot was filled and gave an eery feeling of how crazy it was going to be inside. However we soon discovered that the line up for Santa? Only one kid away...

For weeks my kids have been talking non-stop about Santa...even Kathleen answers glibly, 'Baby, Barbie' when we ask what is Santa bringing you? They have poured over the wishbook, have studied all the pictures of Santa from the Christmas books...watched the movies...and now the moment had arrived....

And struck all three dumb! Peter came around, surprisingly, and then Charlie. Charlie only whispered his wishes and thankfully no announcements!

And Miss Kathleen! Oh, she looked the part and was cute as a button and I just say the best dressed kiddo there but she would only stare and decided she was not getting too close. Getting all there in a picture is always a bit of a we take what we can get (and excuse the crappy picture of the picture, I have no scanner).

I think Kathleen was too much in awe that this mythical 'Santa' was there in the flesh...
Overall, it was a GREAT day, nearly finished out shopping, kids were SUPER behaved and we even braved eating at a restaurant. Peter only had one panicky moment in a store that was a little too overwhelming.

The best part of the day? All three kids fell asleep on the drive home, and then went straight to bed with no fuss that night:)

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Pied Piper

Josh and I have always loved animals...a little too much. We we were first married we had out two cats Evil EB and Josie. Both were cranky, uncuddly and loved to shred furniture and then EB decided litterboxes were for the birds...sad to say (and no great surprise) I discovered I was NOT a cat person.

We have our dogs who I love like furry kids but cats and me? Nope...not a cat person.

Till EB and Josie both passed this summer...I declared I was NOT getting another cat....two weeks later a mouse ran acorss the kitchen floor and I found mousie poo in a nasty place (any place I found mousie poo is nasty!).
Traps didn't work, I found more poo (mice must have thought it was a cats and toddlers...) and then the search the the PERFECT cat, for non cat lovers...

The kids and I went to the Saint John ARL, but never found any the pulled at our heart strings...we went to the Charlotte County SPCA...but nothing there...and then I was back to the CCSPCA and took a second look at a little grey cat the kids held that didn't claw their eyes out when they played with him. Arthur.

A month later the furball came to stay. Initially he drove me batty with clawing the walls, chasing anything that moved, the dogs chased him, the kids chased him and he chased everyone...and I slowly felt like a zoo keeper who just realized that all the cages had been opened up!

But Arthur has won over the family and dogs...well truthfully my kids were madly in love with him the moment the saw the fluffball. Josh and I...not so much. But the cat must have had a chat with one of the dogs...he uses his litter bow like a proper cat, he doesn't claw people, he puts up with the kids (he needs a medal for that one).

As you can see the poor thing puts up with being the kids favorite play toy with no complaints from him...but I guess it sure beats living in a cage at the shelter hoping to be adopted.

Josh makes fun of me because I have quite the trail of followers now...before it was just the yorkies, then Crosby our poodles, Kathleen is usually at my heels or handing off of me and now Arthus has taken to following me too...I look like the Pied Piper walking through the house with the trail of kids and animals.

It took Josh a while to warm to the kitty...last week Arthur finally broke the barrier. He found, killed and presented a dead mouse to us (actually my mother in law got the present). he announced he earned his keep and now when he has a nap cuddles with the cat.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Short but Crazy

The title could be referring to me or after work and at home with the kids....

I am terribly short...Josh likes to point out that I am really only a an inch off being a little person...I am 4 ft 11"...

I like my height, it is easy to recognize me in a crowd...I am the shortest adult. I am so used to not being able to reach things it really doesn't faze me anymore. I like that shoes in size 6 are cuter (I used to work in shoe sales and I can say that as an expert, small shoes =cuteness).
The down side? Buying clothes suck:(  Regular sized clothing is made for TALL people, that does not only include leg lengths but also armholes, shoulers, seams...hence why I hate shopping.
The work thing about my height? 5 lbs on me is an entire SIZE...I weigh the same as my friend (there is no way in God's green Earth will I divulge my weight). She is tall and curvy...but same weight on my shorty body? I am a dumpling:( C'est la vie!

and am I crazy? Oh, we won't argue that one...

Now on to the original part of my post...I get home from work just before 5pm, I pick up the kids are proclaim loudly the entire trip from sitter's to home that they are starving ( I will bet money they have spent the day emptying the sitter's fridge)...once home we have the usual tussle of me yanging to them to hang up coats, lay out your boots, don't throw them there! Pick that up! Don't tramp through the house with wet boots! (that one is a daily thing with Charlie who after 4 yrs is still oblivious to the fact that his boots are muddy and/or wet and there is always something on the other side of the room that he must inspect NOW)

Once free of their wraps, food in tummies (bless the inventor of crock pots and microwaves!), they then have about an hour to amuse themselves before bedtime...

Tonight's entertainment? The boys stripped to their skivvies, grabbed some thick mittens and hats and decided to 'box'...Peter gravely told me after I told them to stop that 'boxing was not fighting, it was a sport!'  Sorry bud! Aint happening here!

5 minutes later I find Kathleen stripped to her pull up, spinning in circles, getting so dizzy she falls over and laying there laughing till she recovers..

and yes she did that for an entire hour till bathtime:)

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Tis the Season

To start I have to say I LOVE Christmas...

But nothing gets my goat more then people around me who whine they are not 'feeling' Christmas, doesn't feel like Christmas yet, not in the spirit..bah humbug you cranks:) I say this with a smile, truly I do:)

I AM in the spirit and mostly because I completely embrace the season. I love the lights on the houses, I am still awestruck at night by the prettiness (and now that I am older I recognized the effort and stress that went into putting up all those lights and better yet the TAKING down that will have to happen). After picking up the kids from the sitters I love how they are actually quiet and GOOD in the van because they are anticipating seeing those pretty lights.

I love the smell of Christmas! We are talking sugar cookies and cinnamon....and let me add these scents are 100% fake:) The sugar cookie smell is from the doggie cologne I use on the dogs are the shop during the holiday season (yes clients LOVE this) and the cinnamon smell is from my Scentsy:) (Don't know what scentsy is? Well you are SOOO missing out! I LOVE it, my friend Jenny sells it and she raved and raved...I thought I gotta try it and I am not a huge fan of scented candles and such but this? Oh me! Oh my!! Oh the delish smells that me house now has (not the usually doggie, little boy, hockey gear smell)! Check it out here and fall in love (and no I don't get paid to say this...rather I plunk down more money on the scents:)

I love the food...I know I would walk/waddle away from Christmas if it were not for some careful eating...I do eat all the sweets I want cause is Christmas! But I eat a uber healthy breakfast, lunch and dinner to make up for the sugar...and I figure with the extra cleaning I do for the big day I MUST burn some calories somewhere??!!

I also LOVE the decorations!! I am crazy about Michaels Craft Store and their holiday deco stuff...I should be banned from the store cause I always find something I cannot live without and they are on the top of my list to hit on Boxing Day Sales...

So, my house is decorated, my tree is up, outside lights WILL be finished once Josh has a few days off, cookies batter is all made, snowman cupcakes are nicely burnt and cooling on my stove (another rant about my stove for another day), my kids are excited because we are braving the malls this Saturday so they can sit with Santa...yes the big man is alive and well in our house:)

The Wish Book is in near tatters from little ones pouring over the pages, fingers are sticky from licking the beaters...

More then anything I am grateful! I feel so blessed that I do have a wonderful holiday with my family and my kids. My children are all healthy, our house is warm, our fridge is full.
I remember the first two Christmases that Josh and I spent as a couple, it was nice being together and spending the holiday with our families but after that our family grew and this season became as exciting as it was when we were children.

For the whiners who are not in the holiday spirit, get some:)